LeBron James is Aaron Rodgers

With the NFL season in full swing no one is quite ready for a serious NBA season preview. So instead I offer to the world a definitive and indisputable list of comparisons. In this case, which starting NFL quarterback most closely resembles a current NBA player. Not in terms of physical appearance, but in terms of their career arc, current situation, media narratives, and my own personal opinion. This is clearly an exact science, but if you disagree with the list feel free to comment. Lets start in the AFC. 

AFC

1. Tom Brady is Stephen Curry: This is difficult, because there isn't really a current NBA player who can match Tom Brady's accomplishments. However, Stephen Curry is a two-time MVP (one time unanimous) and a three-time NBA champion. Thats about as close as it gets to five Super Bowls.  In addition, Tom Brady played for an undefeated Patriots team that lost in soul crushing fashion to the Giants in Super Bowl XLII, and Curry played for a 73 win Warriors team that lost in equally horrifying fashion to the Cavs in the 2016 NBA finals. They also both play for the most hated franchise in their respective sports. 

2. Ryan Tannehill is Blake Griffin: Tannehill occasionally shows promise, but always seems to fail to deliver when you most need him too. Sound familiar? Blake Griffin and Tannehill are also both trying to revive once proud franchises in the Pistons and Dolphins respectively, and are both failing miserably. 

3. Sam Darnold is Kevin Knox: Both are promising rookie talents attempting to strut their stuff in the Big Apple. Both are faced with attempting to repair perennially terrible franchises that are more of a laughingstock than actual sports teams. Good luck to them both. 

4. Josh Allen is Trae Young: Two rookies who have both shown explosive flashes of incredible ability at the collegiate level. They are also both in terrible situations. The Buffalo Bills have real 0-16 potential while the Atlanta Hawks will be lucky to win 12 games this year.  

5. Ben Roethlisberger is Dwyane Wade: Both all time greats at their respective positions, Wade and Roethlisberger have undoubtedly lost a step or two. Both players are still effective in spots but can no longer do it on a daily basis. In addition both have taken a physical beating over the years because of their respective play styles, which hurt them later on in their careers. 

6. Joe Flacco is Austin Rivers: They'll have a moment or two when they get crazy hot, but most of the time look absolutely atrocious. They also both got lucrative contracts they probably didn't deserve.  

7. Andy Dalton is JJ Redick: Both solid players in their respective sport, but there is no way either is taking you to the promised land. Andy Dalton needs a cavalcade of weapons to be effective while JJ Redick needs a good point guard to get him open from three. 

8. Tyrod Taylor is Rajon Rondo: Both players seem to have the starting job at their respective position with a young gun waiting to takeover. In addition both players sitting behind them either have a big personality or a dad with a big personality (google Lavar Ball). 

9. Blake Bortles is Elfrid Payton: Are either of these players good? It's hard to tell sometimes.  

10. Deshaun Watson is Devin Booker: I'm not sure what the ceiling is for either of these players but they are both exceedingly talented. Unfortunately, Watson's lack of an offensive line, and Booker's lack of other good players might prevent them from demonstrating what they are truly capable of when they have the requisite parts around them. 

11. Marcus Mariota is Aaron Gordon: Tons of promise, but it's unclear if Mariota is a real franchise quarterback or if Aaron Gordon can be the best player on a title team. The answer to both is probably no.  

12. Andrew Luck is Victor Oladipo: Both are extremely talented, and have to do the vast majority of the work on offense. If they don't play well their team is more than likely to lose. Also they both play for Indiana based teams. Coincidence? Yep. 

13. Philip Rivers is Chris Paul: Both are incredible players who've had Hall of Fame careers, but they can never quite clear that final hurdle. Neither has been able to reach the ultimate goal of winning a championship. In addition they've both played for an LA based team that has next to no fans.  

14. Case Keenum is Brandon Jennings: They've both had a flash-in-the-pan season where they've looked unbelievable, but are otherwise a league average player at best.  

15. Derek Carr is Damian Lillard: Derek Carr and Damian Lillard aren't the best quarterback and point guard respectively in their own leagues, but they are some of the better ones. Furthermore, neither of them seem to have enough players around them to seriously compete.  

16. Patrick Mahomes is Luka Doncic: This may be a tad premature since Luka hasn't played a dribble of NBA basketball, but the excitement around Mahomes is similar to the excitement around Doncic. Mahomes has an absolute cannon for an arm, and Doncic is the best pure passer to come out of the draft in quite some time. Lets hope Luka can have the kind of impact Mahomes has had early on in the NFL season. Neither of their teams are gonna play much defense either. 

NFC    

1. Nick Foles is Noah Vonleh: These guys are just placeholders. Wentz is going to come back and quarterback for the Eagles, while Vonleh is going to kill time until Porzingis returns to the Knicks lineup. 

2. Dak Prescott is Lonzo Ball: Both guys have run the show for the most popular franchise in the NFL and the NBA respectively (Cowboys and Lakers). Both are rather quiet. Both have had moments of brilliance and moments that made their GMs question whether or not they made the right decision starting them. Does Dak have a dad who tweets a lot about his "shoe company?" Because then the resemblance would be so uncanny I'd be concerned we were all in an episode of the Twilight Zone. 

3. Alex Smith is Paul George: Captain Check-Down and PG-13 are both solid, dependable and reliable players. Not to mention really talented. However, you always feel like your ceiling is insanely low if they are your best player. Alex Smith isn't great when he has to throw deep, and Paul George's fourth quarter scoring numbers reflect the opposite of clutch. 

4. Eli Manning is Carmelo Anthony: Father time is undefeated. Eli and Melo are simply his latest victims. These guys are not even shadows of their former selves they're a memory of their former selves.  

5. Kirk Cousins is Nikola Jokic: Cousins is pretty good but he's got some serious limitations. Much like Jokic who's amazing on offense but his defense is nonexistent. Frustrating is the word I would use to describe both players. 

6. Aaron Rodgers is LeBron James:  Both are arguably the best player in their sport, and maybe the greatest to ever play. Their talent is seemingly limitless, and both will make plays that seem impossible. They are both prone to passive-aggressive styles of leadership. They are also criticized for not being accomplished enough because of how talented they are. Aaron has won one Super Bowl and LeBron has a losing record in the Finals. In addition they have both had to drag teams through seasons because of poor front office decisions. 

7. Mitchell Trubisky is Marvin Bagley III: These two are great athletes at their respective positions, but there are question marks regarding how much their games translate at the next level. Trubisky isn't a good progression reader, and Bagley struggles on defense while exhibiting some limitations offensively. They also play for struggling franchises.  

8. Matthew Stafford is Karl Anthony Towns: Towns and Stafford are ridiculously talented, and both put up eye-popping numbers. However, neither have them have really been able to translate that into any kind of meaningful success. They have both also been accused of choking in big moments. 

9. Drew Brees is Dirk Nowitzki: Both are getting up there in age but Brees is still performing at a really high level, while Nowitzki has undoubtedly regressed. That said, they are two of the best to ever do it in their sport, and they are both under-discussed as one of the best players of all time at their respective position. Also both of their teams have gotten significantly younger while they remain the wily vet. 

10. Matt Ryan is Klay Thompson: Both are really good, but both probably need a plethora of weapons to perform at their absolute best. It's unlikely that Klay or Matty Ice could be the best player on their team and still contend for jewelry. 

11. Cam Newton is Russell Westbrook: Newton and Westbrook are both super enigmatic and super athletic. Superman and the human triple-double put on absolute spectacles, but it feels at times that it is at the expense of their team success. They are also both exceedingly criticized for their play style, and are both probably gonna go down as some of the greatest athletes to never win a championship.   

12. Ryan FitzPatrick is Jamal Crawford: They are old, but both are capable of getting scorching hot and winning a game or two for your team. Unfortunately consistency is often the issue for FitzMagic and J Crossover.    

13. Jared Goff is Terry Rozier: I think its fair to say these are really solid players. These aren't scrubs or anything, but man, Sean McVay and Brad Stevens sure make a lot of guys look better than they actually are. 

14. Jimmy Garoppolo is Donovan Mitchell: Jimmy G and Donovan Mitchell have both shown a ton of promise, but they are going to need a lot more pieces around them, if they are going to really contend. They also seem exuberant, and excited about their situation. 

15. Russell Wilson is Kristaps Porzingis: Porzingis and Wilson are both the only reason their teams are slightly relevant. Russell Wilson is running for his life behind a terrible offensive line, and Porzinigis effectively has to carry the Knicks on every offensive possession.  

16. Sam Bradford is Andrew Bogut: Both are brittler than fancy glassware, and both haven't really lived up to their first round draft status.